19 October 2011

Reluctant Adult

Ever feel like we're thrown into adulthood like a cat being thrown into a pool?  One day you're passing notes (or nowadays texting them) to your girlfriend about the latest dating gossip among music nerds or jocks or hippy kids, and the next you're expected to choose a career path, pay taxes, and consider dying for your country. Suddenly we're able to decide who is competent enough to run  a world super power and we aren't even running our own lives yet.  "18 = Adulthood" seems somewhat... ridiculous.

Of course, when I was eighteen I knew everything, could run the country myself, and still have time for a thriving social life (ok... my social life has never been "thriving" but you get the point).

Obviously everyone matures at different ages.  Some kids are ready for responsibility at 18 (or 5-- Dakota Fanning anyone?) while others shouldn't have it until their forties.  Other than the government wanting more money and more soldiers, who can really say who's an adult and who's a giant child with facial hair?  Not that I'm trying to promote free-loading adult children, I just hope the previous generations will be patient.  I have some friends with homes and babies and others who live with their parents to get back on their feet.  Some are still partying 24/7 and some are reaching pivotal points in their careers.  All different ages, different backgrounds, different perspectives, yet all trying to find their place in this world and what makes them happy.  It's interesting to watch everyone grow and change.

In case you're wondering... I have days when I feel so grown-up I could buy a house, raise five children to be doctors, take on dogs, and write a memoir about how I did it.  Then there are days I hate adulthood with a passion that will never die (those are the days I pay bills or have a hangover).  And finally, there are days when coloring with that amazing 64 crayon box (glitter crayons!!!) and making a Play-Doh buffet sound absolutely perfect. 

For me, full adulthood is still on the back burner.  Children won't come around until my 30's and I may never feel ready enough to take on a mortgage-- though in this economy who can blame me?  Don't misunderstand, I have the utmost respect for everyone who runs households, raises children, and possess thriving careers-- I am not ready.  Although I love being married, getting into bars, watching rated R films, and forming my own home, I love cartoons, staying up WAY too late, and spending days being useless (the kind of days when your parents would nag at you to "be productive").  Some times I'm tired, frustrated, overwhelmed, and I just need to STOP.  Take a break, watch a cartoon, play a video game, LAUGH, and forget I'm 26 with debts, work, and cares.  Not run from my problems-- no one likes a quitter-- and not reminisce about times past, but every once in a while see the world with innocent eyes and love the little things. And laugh at myself... taking yourself too seriously will age you by decades.

I will always be a kid at heart and try to see the humor in everything (even road rage)... It's time to stop feeling guilty for wanting that Lego set or Fisher Price kitchen (those babies are pimped out btw) and get into a Nerf gun war or make a finger painting self-portrait.


  1. Best. Post. Ever. I think the inbetween is what makes adulthood frustrating. My house is split-I lean more towards the let's push forward and go for the babies and more responsibilities while Randy feels more like we are still so young and he doesn't want to totally give up all his freedom yet (plus debt scares the living crap out of him). Being type A and loving to plan EVERYTHING I figured by 26 I would have a house, kids, great paying job, dogs, and have my shiz together. Then recession happened-epic fail. I sometimes wonder if my frustrations stem from not following my plans, not having accomplished what, at 20, I thought I would. Then somedays, like you, I go buy a pack of markers or crayons and draw out my frustrations and remember that scented markers are cool (and smell so much better than when we were kids!)!

  2. I'm going to have to get me a pack of scented markers... watermelon and green apple were my favorites!

    And I know what you mean. I thought I'd be in the same place when I turned 26 and how far I am from achieving any of those things now. Not that the recession is an excuse... but it kind of is. Our parents and previous generations have no idea what it's like (for the most part, there are always exceptions) trying to compete in today's job market, not to mention knowing that we're the generation that is supposed to be less well off than our parents... it's all very discouraging. That's why we need a little glitter and unicorns and video games and picture books and squirt guns in our lives.