Strawberry Tops: A "How To" Blog

Not sure if I've mentioned this before, but I grew up in a bakery family. Decades ago, my Great Grandfather Jarosch (on my mom's side) moved from Germany to Chicago and opened his own bakery. After success in the city, he moved the business to Elk Grove Village, IL and thus the Jarosch Bakery we know and love today was born.

It's always been a family effort, my grandparents in charge when I was little, and my aunt and uncle taking over when my grandfather became ill with cancer.  There's a lot of love and pride in a family bakery and it shows thru the cakes-- equal parts gorgeously decorated and delicious-- cookies, breads, pastries, etc etc. After working there on and off for 5 years, I've got a few stories about bakery life I'd love to share. I'll write about it down the road.

Anyway, one of the most popular cake fillings at Jarosch is fresh strawberries. I mean... duh. Makes total sense, no? Needless to say, as a "Bakery Girl" there were crates of strawberries that needed the tops removed and to be halved. And being German, it was imperative for my Great Grandma to create a method that saved as much of the strawberry as possible since they're expensive, especially when out of season. 

Step 1: Get a strawberry.

IMPORTANT: Do not skip Step 1.

 Step 2: Retrieve a cutting board and small paring knife.

(I got my cutting board and knife from The Pampered Chef)

Step 3: Insert blade as close to the center as possible, as well as a little underneath the top.  

Step 4: Rotate knife all the way around center, remaining close to the leaves.

I actually rotate the strawberry into the blade more than I move the knife.

 Step 5: Remove top.

See how much of the strawberry is left? 

I hope this was helpful. It may take a little getting used to, but after doing hundreds (maybe THOUSANDS) of them, you get the hang of it. This is great when you're making fruit salad. Do you use a special technique to remove strawberry tops? Do you think I'm utterly WEIRD for writing a blog post about it?!

Pulled Pork Enchiladas

I love many things in the world, but I'm pretty sure guacamole and Mexican food are in the Top 5, if not the Top 2. I've never met an ingredient I did not like in the culinary world of tortillas, peppers, cheese, and spices. Who knows, I might have been Mexican in another life. The irony is that I married a Greek/Hispanic man who prefers Italian food. Go figure.

But when Cinco de Mayo rolled around this past May 5th and I saw this recipe for Slow Cooker Pulled Pork Enchiladas in my free Better Homes and Gardens email newsletter (seriously people, it's free... why haven't you signed up?!), I knew it would be a sin not to make them. Of course... I didn't make them ON Cinco de Mayo-- we never eat Mexican food on Mexican holidays. But was it worth turning my apartment into a sauna from hell to make these? Absolutely.

First rule of making Mexican food: ALWAYS have guacamole. And if you don't like avocados, read "guacamole" as "tequila."

Following in my mom's footsteps, I make mine homemade. It's just so easy that there's no point in wasting money on the gross is-this-actually-booger-sauce? packaged kind. Plus my nearby semi-fancy grocery store, Gelson's Market, actually puts "Ready to Eat" stickers on avocados so I can choose avocados without thinking.

Let's all take a moment to ignore the chipping nail polish on my thumb. So chic.

Back to the enchiladas. Yes, this is a slow cooker recipe, but only in part. That's how you cook the meat. This is still a dish that requires hands-on technique, and by "technique" I mean "you roll up the tortillas." But dammit! After this came out of the oven looking fabulous I was convinced I'm the next Rick Bayless.

Impressive, no?

In true Jamie-messes-up-every-new-recipe-she-tries Fashion, I forgot the small can of diced green chilies. Or it's lost in my poor excuse for a pantry. Either way, it's too late now! Besides, next time I make this I'm going to substitute real jalapeños.

Also, the recipe calls for a 3 1/2 pound boneless pork shoulder. I went to my ghetto budget grocery store, Von's, only to discover they were literally-- so not exaggerating-- OUT OF PORK. I'm pretty sure that's un-American if not illegal. So I moseyed on over to Gelson's, a very patriotic store that always carries dead pig, only to find they didn't have pork shoulder. Harumph. 

Always the resourceful one (I should've been a Girl Scout), I bought a pork butt instead. And boy was that the Best. Idea. Ever. The meat was tender, juicy, unbelievably easy to pull.... **wipes drool from mouth** I'm all about generosity (don't laugh!), but these are so good that you probably shouldn't share.

A hot mess of deliciousness.

Just be aware: the recipe tells you to trim the fat on the pork shoulder. If you're familiar with butts of the pork variety, you'll note that trimming the fat is laughable, especially if your knives are dull, as in my case. Scraping it off AFTER will do the trick. 

Thus, my recipe is better has a few changes so use mine :)  And be sure to read the notes underneath! 

Okay, enough talk. Let's get cooking!

Pulled Pork Enchiladas 

3 1/2 pound pork butt

2 cups or 1 - 14oz can organic chicken broth (low sodium if possible)

1 medium onion, chopped

6 cloves of garlic, smashed and minced

1Tbsp ground cumin

1Tbsp chili powder

1/2 tsp crushed red pepper

1tsp kosher salt

1 - 10oz can RED enchilada sauce

2 - 10oz cans GREEN enchilada sauce

2 Tbsp chopped fresh cilantro (or however much you want)

1 - 4oz can diced green chilies OR 2 jalapeños, chopped

10oz cotija cheese, crumbled

12-15, 8in flour tortillas

Grape tomatoes, halved

Cilantro, snipped

In a 3 1/2- or 4-quart slow cooker combine pork butt, broth, onion, garlic, cumin, chili powder, red pepper, and salt. If you're using the jalapeños, add those as well. Cover and cook on low-heat setting for 10 hours or on high-heat setting for 5 to 6 hours.

Remove pork from slow cooker, reserving cooking liquid. Scrape off fat and, using two forks, pull meat into coarse strands.

In a large bowl combine pork, 1/2 cup of the RED enchilada sauce, 3 to 4 tablespoons of the reserved cooking liquid, and the 2 tablespoons chopped cilantro. Set aside.

In a medium bowl combine the remaining enchilada sauces, 1/4 cup of the reserved cooking liquid (discard any remaining cooking liquid), and, if using them, the diced green chile peppers. Spread about 1 cup of sauce mixture in the bottom of a 3-quart rectangular baking dish; set aside.

Preheat over to 400 degrees F. Divide pork mixture and 2 cups of the cheese among tortillas, placing meat and cheese near the edge of each tortilla. Roll up tortillas. Place filled tortillas, seam sides down, in the prepared baking dish (place tortillas close together); top with most of** the remaining sauce. Cover with foil; bake for 25 minutes. Sprinkle with the remaining cheese. Bake, uncovered, about 5 minutes more or until heated through and cheese is softened and starts to brown slightly.

Garnish with tomatoes, cilantro, guacamole, and/or sour cream.

Hodge Podge Tips

• I know the BHG recipe says 1 type of enchilada sauce, but I happened to have one can of red and two of green. It was such a flavorful combo and the green cuts the acidity of the red so well that it's now the permanent way I'll make these. 
• To cut down on sodium, use fresh jalapeños instead of canned chilies and make homemade enchilada sauce.
• BHG says 8-12 tortillas, but I still had plenty of meat, cheese, and sauce leftover to fill another 3-5. However, I'm not sure they would've fit in my baking dish anyway, so I added more sauce** to the meat and popped it in the fridge to be used for nachos at a later date.
• I used up all the cheese on the top, fyi, because I didn't want stinky leftover cheese in my fridge.
• Cotija is like the Mexican version of Feta cheese-- strong and slightly stinky. Be warned. If it's too strong for you, try Manchego instead.
• Yes, BHG says you only need a 1/2 cup of sauce on the bottom-- they are LIARS! The sauce was completely absorbed by the tortillas, causing them to get crispy and stick to the pan. Use at least one cup.
• I believe true enchiladas use corn tortillas. The flour ones are easier to roll but if you love corn, go for it!
• When you're done rolling each enchilada there will be a lot of space on both ends where you can stuff more meat-- do it.
• Also, I strained my cooking liquid. I didn't want soggy onions in it, plus there were extra pieces of pork that fell off and sank to the bottom so I had to retrieve those.

Booking for Looks

As I pondered about the idea that Heaven is a Bookstore, I remained quite aware that I was on earth in a REAL bookstore full of scrumptious new reads I was DYING to take home. Walking into a Barnes & Noble with a credit card is extremely dangerous for me. There are so many books I want to read, so much I want to know, so many stories that need to be told!

Hence why I'm the weird chick taking pictures: I want to remember all the books that catch my eye so down the road I can look for them when I return with someone else's money gift cards (or search for them on Amazon... shhhh don't tell).  Though I have a Kindle and highly recommend the convenience and ease that comes with an eReader, it's still comforting to hold a book in your hands.

It's hard to resist a gorgeous hardcover with a colorful illustration...

... or a newly printed version of a Jane Austen classic. If I was a billionaire I'd continuously buy copies of all Austen novels and dedicate an entire floor of my 3-story mahogany library to her and her fan fiction. Don't judge.

 

I really wish bookstores had a designated "Jane Austen Fan Fiction" section since new books are constantly being published. It's a chore trying to find JAFF amidst the hundreds of other books in the Fiction/Literature section. But it's worth my frustrating persistence when I find a good one.

I also love books set in Ireland (like The Last Storyteller): I have a thing for Irish fiction. That's why I love Maeve Binchy-- all her books take place there since she's, you know, IRISH. So if you're weird like me and enjoy books set in the Land of Blarney, read her.

When I'm not dumping all the Fiction/Lit books on the floor trying to find the next JAFF book for my collection or an Irish love story, you can find me scouring the Young Adult Lit section as I'm also a YA junkie. These books have the BEST covers and I'm a sucker for beautiful cover art. That's what attracts my attention in the first place-- take heed book publishers!

This Kingdom Keepers series combines YA with Disneyworld, making me giddy with geeky delight! The Extraordinary Education of Nicholas Benedict is the fourth in an installment of books about children with high intelligence and gifts that very bad people want to exploit. They're being protected by the Benedict Society as puzzle-filled adventures ensue. For a YA book, it's a pretty intelligent read... or I'm really dumb... either way, check it out!

Naturally, I progressed from children's books and wandered into the Romance section (why are they next to each other?!). I usually avoid Romance... which is so judgmental and wrong of me because I'd probably LOVE these books too.

I found this little beauty about a man who wakes up after a Halloween party to find he's been turned into a vampire by the beautiful woman he thought was wearing a vampire costume. 

The real question is... how do you NOT want to read that book?!

Finally, these were sitting on the Best Selling Paperbacks table and I ALMOST bought them:

Have you read the 50 Shades trilogy?! Most of my friends are and I'm overcome with curiosity. However, I was also overcome with the same curiosity about the Twilight series and those books were a big fat fail (except Eclipse). But the trilogy is $30 on the Kindle... maybe a birthday present to myself??? I think so.

Snow White and the Huntsman

**This review contains SPOILERS. Read at your own risk.**

Who doesn't love a good fairytale? Better yet, who doesn't love a good fairytale that's been turned on its head and made into a 90 minute film with three dimensional characters, interesting subplots, and gorgeous visuals?

That's exactly what you get for the first half of Snow White and the Huntsman. We're given Snow White's backstory and the tale of how her father came to marry Ravena, Charlize Theron's bitterly twisted and youth-obsessed Evil Queen. We feel the odd incestual vibe of a brother and sister eternally connected through pain and dark magic and feel the Brother's creepiness even more when he slides his hand up Snow White's dress.  We learn the Huntsman is a young widower trying to drown his sorrows in alcohol and is careless about his life. And what do we learn about Snow White? She's a nice girl trapped in a tower.

Sadly, Snow White is the least dimensional or interesting character of the entire film. While I want to blame this entirely on the one-note acting wonder that is Kristen Stewart, I'm inclined to place a bit of fault on the writing as well, especially since the second half of the movie felt like an altogether different film. It's as if the original screenwriter paused the story right when the Huntsman and Snow run into the Dwarves on their way to the Duke's castle and another writer who was told by "Hollywood" to make the ending BIGGER took over.

After that, everything happens so quickly that it's rushed and careless. Suddenly, the dwarf Gus-- who represents Dopey from the Disney version-- is killed, they run into Snow's childhood boy toy, Ravena shows up and gives her a poisoned apple, Snow's alive again, there's a battle at the castle, and Snow kills the Queen. The end. There's no motivation as to why the Queen chooses an apple other than its reminiscent of a scene at the beginning with young Snow & her "prince." How would the Queen have known about that? Is she psychic? Nothing in the film suggests that she is, but of course, no one bothered to detail her powers either.

This might be nit-picky but it made no sense how Snow was able to out run the guards, slide into a sewer drain, fall a hundred or so feet into rocky waters, manage to swim to the shore through rough waves, and ride bareback on a wild horse directly after escaping a cell she lived in for the last ten or twelve years until a minute before that all happened. Physically, she wouldn't have the endurance. Plus, she gets ONE thirty second combat lesson from the Huntsman and suddenly she's a warrior princess leading men into battle?! Don't even get me started on her motivational speech to the men-- it's worth watching just for that train wreck of a monologue. Oh, and to see Snow holding a tree branch as she's inaugurated to Queen... seriously.

The biggest frustration is the irresolution of one MAJOR plot: the potential romance between Snow White and the Huntsman. I mean, it's the frickin' title of the movie!!!

However, the film isn't all bad. Like I said, the first half is great: engaging, visual, exciting, emotional-- I was hooked. Which is why the second half was such a disappointment. I love the dwarves (with a cast of amazing actors like Bob Hoskins, Ian McShane, Eddie Marsan, and Toby Jones who can blame me?) and would've loved more time with them. SW&TH is worth watching for Charlize Theron and Sam Spruell (the Evil Queen and her brother Finn) alone.  It wouldn't surprise me if producers pushed for more focus on Ravena during production since she's the most interesting and sexiest female in the film.

And ladies, can I get "hell yeah!" for the casting of Chris Hemsworth and Sam Claflin?! Hell yeah!

I like the adaptation of this classic fairytale, to give it a "what would that look like outside of a cartoon" vision. The interpretation was great, the execution was subpar. Overall, if you love epic fantasies you'll probably enjoy Snow White and the Huntsman, but if not, save your pennies for June 22nd's Brave, pop some popcorn at home, and rent the film when its out on DVD.

Heaven is a Bookstore

While wandering through Barnes & Noble at the Americana the other day, it suddenly occurred to me that I would be perfectly happy if Heaven is a giant bookstore. And of course by "bookstore" I mean "bookpalace."

This never-ending store holds every book to ever exist (or is still being published) in every language, alive or dead, while constantly smelling like coffee and old books without the dust. Books are never out of stock or out of print, they're all free, and each one has that slightly worn, slightly "loved" charm of a book from a used bookstore. Although time is irrelevant in the Afterlife, there would be periods of daytime with rich natural sunlight flowing in through huge windows, as well as a nighttime of cozy, warm, soft lighting that never strains the eyes.

And you will always find a chair. Not just any chair, though, a big comfy chair with a blanket that could have been knitted only by your grandma, a cushy ottoman for your feet, and a little table with a lamp next to each one. Some are gathered together for book clubs or socializing in the cafe, others are next to fireplaces and windows, and still others are tucked away in hidden corners only you know about. Whatever seating you want you'll find.  For those that love reading outside, the store has beautiful grounds with any number of outdoor lounge chairs or trees for you to lay under, and the weather is always exactly what it should be.

Like any decent bookstore worth its salt, there's an excellent cafe serving the finest coffee, espresso, tea, etc. you could ever want at no charge. In my case, all the Seattle's Best caramel lattes and Starbucks iced white mochas I can drink. You can even get a glass of red wine to sip while enjoying a sexy romance novel (yes, those will be allowed: Heaven doesn't censor). The food menu ranges from homemade fresh-baked pain au chocolat to organic soups and salads to free range organic chicken or vegetable paninis. Since it's Heaven, you can order whatever you want and it'll be just the way you like it. And everything is calorie/fat/sodium/cholesterol/preservative/cruelty free.

No one actually works at the bookstore but anyone will be able to help you find a book. And the book signings... every author imaginable, from Plato to the Apostle Paul to Chaucer to Austen to Tolkien to Rowling, will have regular meet & greets. But conversations will never rise above a gentle hum, despite unending conversations and group discussions. Music will play as well-- whatever music you need to enjoy a good book or relax and sip coffee or discuss esoteric poetic themes and philosophical questions.

Our cats and dogs and other furry friends will wander around, ready to curl up in our laps and have us absentmindedly scratch their ears while we read.

Yes. Heaven is a bookstore.

Beene

Here it is, my first screenplay installment! Please try to contain your excitement.


Beene is the title of a short 12pg screenplay I wrote in college for Adaptation 1. It's inspired by the short story "You Know How to Spell Elijah" by Dave Eggers. The script is such a loose adaptation that I don't really need his permission to make the film (these words actually came from Eggers after I emailed him about it-- all he wanted was a copy of the film if it ever got made... such a cool guy).

The logline is as follows... wait... you don't know what a logline is?! If you do, you have my permission to skip to the next section. Every film you've ever watched has a logline. It's a one (or at the most two) sentence summary of the movie. In extremely simple terms: it's the idea. This is not to be confused with the "tagline" of a film which is that little blurb on the movie poster that makes you more curious about the it.

Example... Brave: Change your fate.
It says nothing about the actual story, but you're definitely intrigued to see it!

Sidebar: I can't tell you how RIDICULOUSLY excited I am for this film!!! Like... pee-in-my-pants excited. Have I mentioned it's a goal of mine to work with/for Disney Pixar?! I'm sure everyone who loves movies would love to work for them, but I would LITERALLY CRY if I got the chance. Tell you what, when that happens I'm sending all of my followers a Pixar present. I'm 100% serious.

Anyway, here's my logline: After several discouraging encounters with people throughout the day, a man flips out at the airport over a family's argument about how to spell "Elijah."

My favorite part about writing this script is that while I was still in school, my professor asked if she could use it as a teaching example (no, not for "what not to do") because she really enjoyed my character descriptions and writing. It felt amazing to have my peers recognize my name in other classes because they'd read my work. Not trying to brag, I'm completely blessed to have that happen.

For the most part, I thoroughly enjoy Beene. It makes me laugh. As the writer, there are always bits and pieces I want to adjust, but perfectionism will destroy an artist's career so I'm throwing my script out into the Internet on its fifth draft.
Couple things: My scripts belong to me. I own the rights and have registered my work with the WGA and am seeking copyrights. Not that I think YOU'RE going to steal my work, but I need to protect myself from shady-ass people.


Also, I love CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM. If parts don't make sense or you're not a fan of a character or even the story, that's OK. Just please tell me why and be cool about it, don't just comment that the script is "stupid" or "sucks." Yes, people will be downright mean in the Biz, but on my blog we play by my rules. Prison rules.
And if you love it, I'd also love to know why. It all goes toward helping me improve as a screenwriter.

As always, thanks for reading!

You can read my script here.

'Smore Cookies

Whoever came up with the combination of graham crackers, chocolate, and marshmallows should receive a Nobel Peace prize for bringing together the 3 flavors I'm sure could unite the planet.  Here they are in cookie form:

Don't you just want one...

Wipe that drool off your face.

The recipe is from Erica's Sweet Tooth (best baking blog EVER!) and I'll let you get it from there.  Please ignore the superiority of her photos over mine-- not everyone can be a dental student, amazing baker, AND excellent photographer... some of us have LIVES. 

     However, I'm not fully convinced about this recipe because there's just so much darn chocolate (gasp!). I promise you I am a woman it's just that chocolate doesn't do it for me, I love the graham cracker and marshmallows.  I attempted half the batch normal then topped the second half just with marshmallows-- the presentation left something to be desired.  When I go for it a second time I think I'd like to sprinkle a fewer amount of mini chocolate chips (or none) in the batter to preserve the graham cracker flavor.